Crying Over Spilt Milk: A Love Letter to Necter
Written by: Brianna Coccia
Edited by: Travis Ryan
I cannot tell you the amount of times I have been asked if I was a member of the band Necter. What started as a funny coincidence has since turned into one of the biggest compliments I’ve ever received.
When I joined the local Long Island music scene circa 2015, Necter was one of the first bands to catch my eye. If I remember correctly, I saw Sam and Bri play Necter’s classic “Demons”, and from that moment I was smitten. I couldn’t help but find my own story in their lyrics and went to dance with my own demons out on the floor. I’m such a dweeb that this led to begging my friends to help me learn “Demons” on the ukulele—I’m just a little bit of a fan, you know?
Since then, I have tried to attend every Necter show possible. Eventually, I attended so many shows and streamed their music so frequently that I’d committed the majority of the lyrics to memory. (Okay so there were a few hiccups; listen, “You’re just blowing smoke” sounds a lot like “You just don't smoke”, okay?!)
Now let’s fast forward to exactly 12:29 pm on December 7th, 2019, when I got a text asking if I wanted to do guest vocals at West Fall Recording Studios. It felt entirely unreal that I would be given this chance. I was being asked by some of my favorite people, in my favorite band to help create beautiful music. It meant the world to me to know that these talented musicians—whom I had begun to love long before I befriended them—wanted me to be part of this creative process. I immediately knew I would do whatever needed to be done to be there.
I feel an immense sense of pride in being able to say I feature on three songs from Necter’s Spilt Milk album: “Happy Misery”, “Run”, and “Navii”. I will always jam out the hardest to “Happy Misery” because I resonate so hard with the lyrics. One set that really hits home:
“I’ve got a fatal case of the comparisons where I don’t know if I’m as happy as I should be, could be better, right?
Learning now that vulnerability is a cage unlocked with the key pressed to my palm”
I’ve experienced situations where I had to evaluate where I was at emotionally, knowing that where I was at the time wasn’t the end point. Knowing that things could change for the better, but always feeling vulnerable to the risks that come with living a full life.
I can remember being at the studio and hearing some of the songs they’d never played for or shown to the public before. It only took a few seconds for my cheeks to stretch from ear to ear and my eyes to well up with tears. I was so happy to be present at that moment that I could feel the proverbial butterflies in my stomach flying around. There was as much laughter and goofiness as you’d expect, with no shortage of jokes and silly commentary. There was a continuous grin on every face in the building, and I think that truly embodies the effect that Necter has on their fans.
I’ve tried to sit down and write about how I feel about the band, but no matter how many times I’ve started writing this, I always felt I wasn’t fully expressing what Necter has meant to me these past years. Their music has been my therapy, providing me with the words I didn’t know I needed to hear in the darkest of times. I can’t tell you how many times I have sat in my car and cried my heart out to these peaches. Their music has inspired me to take control of the situations I’m in and make the outcome what I want and need it to be. They have taught me to own the pain and struggle I have been through and rise stronger every time.
Necter has been creating not only a group of fans, but a true family since their birth back in 2015. That family has grown to shamelessly cry together in public and learned that it's okay to embrace the hardships in life. Through all the seasons of life, no amount of weathering will get us down while we have each other. Together we can sing along to the ups and downs, the hots and colds, the happy misery.
A full album review can be found here!
Celebrate Necter’s album release at the Massapequa VFW 191 Veterans Blvd Massapequa, New York 11758 on Friday March 6th 2020 at 7pm!